I need to find a niche. I just feel like I'm going through everything because it's required or expected of. Not so sure what I'm really accomplishing here, I just hope it's worth it in the long run. It's a robotic process, do this, do that, no don't do it so differently. Job hunting for the summer makes me fear for what's in store after college is over. I'm really scared. Terrified even, because as of now I'm not sure how secure I really am about what I want after college anymore.
Full of anxiety as usual. I should consider going to see the school's psychologist.
Saturday, May 31, 2008
Tuesday, May 27, 2008
Memorial Weekend
FRIDAY:
Lewis and I went to watch "The Fall" at the Edwards Theater, a really good movie I must say. In the interview with Lee Pace, he said the movie was filmed in 26 countries. He's my new celebrity crush right now, alongside with James Marsden and James Macavoy. I kicked Milo Ventimiglia to the curb, man. The child actress in the movie was adorable, purely naive and extremely sweet. Anyways, Lewis and I had dinner at Gen and we ran into Jasmine and her brother. We laughed for what seemed like a hour. Good times.
Heading over to the theater, there was a huge commotion buzzing near the bookstore and Golden Spoon. People were crowding to get in somewhere and there were guys that looked like the Secret Service hanging around. The pathways were gated so we had to walk around. Some girl just wanted frozen yogurt and demanded she walk through. The guys guarding the place were like, "Just walk around." The celebrity? Laura Bush and her daughter. Apparently they wrote a children's book and were doing a book signing. Another guy near us asked the security guards "Who's that?" Genuinely not knowing who that was, Lewis told him it was the First Lady. The guy just made a face and shrugged the new information as if it wasn't important. We basically cracked up at that point, that says a lot, if the average person doesn't know who the First Lady is.
SATURDAY:
We were going to watch "Indiana Jones" with Nancy, James, and her cousin, Shirley, but be never did. Went to Costco and pigged out on pizza. Later drove over to Michael's and went craft store shopping. Nancy's friends came to visit so we chilled for a bit. We let the guys party or whatever and the rest of us headed over to my place to watch "27 Dresses". Still a really cute movie. Katherine Heigl is charismatic. Didn't sleep until 2.
SUNDAY:
Spent most of the morning doing nothing. I think we were going to hang out with Nancy, but we never did. I cleaned...A LOT. I know it's not going to last long, but at least my conscience will be, knowing that I cleaned most of the dirt and gunk away from the counter tops and floors. Lewis and I made herb roasted chicken and homemade chive mashed potatoes again :). Good stuff. Watching lots of Hulu and later "Shaun of the Dead" was horrifying. That movie was so gross, it was the same director of "Hot Fuzz" though. Stayed up to watch MadTV. Didn't sleep until 2.
MONDAY:
Woke up at 9:30! I didn't want to sleep in till noon again. Did some homework. Went to Del Taco, which shall be the last time. The food there is so bad for you. Headed over to Albertsons. Dropped Nancy's DVD off at Blockbusters. Moped for a bit when we got back. Stayed at Lewis's. I picked classes for next quarter for over 2 hours. We both did some more homework. Nancy calls and the plan was to watch "Made of Honor" at 9:55 pm. Lewis and I are acting our age now, yay! We stayed out for a bit and slept late.
TODAY:
Back to the same old classes and work.
Lewis and I went to watch "The Fall" at the Edwards Theater, a really good movie I must say. In the interview with Lee Pace, he said the movie was filmed in 26 countries. He's my new celebrity crush right now, alongside with James Marsden and James Macavoy. I kicked Milo Ventimiglia to the curb, man. The child actress in the movie was adorable, purely naive and extremely sweet. Anyways, Lewis and I had dinner at Gen and we ran into Jasmine and her brother. We laughed for what seemed like a hour. Good times.
Heading over to the theater, there was a huge commotion buzzing near the bookstore and Golden Spoon. People were crowding to get in somewhere and there were guys that looked like the Secret Service hanging around. The pathways were gated so we had to walk around. Some girl just wanted frozen yogurt and demanded she walk through. The guys guarding the place were like, "Just walk around." The celebrity? Laura Bush and her daughter. Apparently they wrote a children's book and were doing a book signing. Another guy near us asked the security guards "Who's that?" Genuinely not knowing who that was, Lewis told him it was the First Lady. The guy just made a face and shrugged the new information as if it wasn't important. We basically cracked up at that point, that says a lot, if the average person doesn't know who the First Lady is.
SATURDAY:
We were going to watch "Indiana Jones" with Nancy, James, and her cousin, Shirley, but be never did. Went to Costco and pigged out on pizza. Later drove over to Michael's and went craft store shopping. Nancy's friends came to visit so we chilled for a bit. We let the guys party or whatever and the rest of us headed over to my place to watch "27 Dresses". Still a really cute movie. Katherine Heigl is charismatic. Didn't sleep until 2.
SUNDAY:
Spent most of the morning doing nothing. I think we were going to hang out with Nancy, but we never did. I cleaned...A LOT. I know it's not going to last long, but at least my conscience will be, knowing that I cleaned most of the dirt and gunk away from the counter tops and floors. Lewis and I made herb roasted chicken and homemade chive mashed potatoes again :). Good stuff. Watching lots of Hulu and later "Shaun of the Dead" was horrifying. That movie was so gross, it was the same director of "Hot Fuzz" though. Stayed up to watch MadTV. Didn't sleep until 2.
MONDAY:
Woke up at 9:30! I didn't want to sleep in till noon again. Did some homework. Went to Del Taco, which shall be the last time. The food there is so bad for you. Headed over to Albertsons. Dropped Nancy's DVD off at Blockbusters. Moped for a bit when we got back. Stayed at Lewis's. I picked classes for next quarter for over 2 hours. We both did some more homework. Nancy calls and the plan was to watch "Made of Honor" at 9:55 pm. Lewis and I are acting our age now, yay! We stayed out for a bit and slept late.
TODAY:
Back to the same old classes and work.
Wednesday, May 21, 2008
Nerdiest Poem to the Max
Plus Lewis and I enjoyed that portion of the movie. Go watch it for yourselves, Harold and Kumar 2: Escape from Guantanamo Bay I mean. I found this on a friend's blog post:
I’m sure that I will always be
A lonely number like root three
The three is all that’s good and right,
Why must my three keep out of sight
Beneath the vicious square root sign,
I wish instead I were a nine
For nine could thwart this evil trick,
with just some quick arithmetic
I know I’ll never see the sun,
as 1.7321
Such is my reality,
a sad irrationality
When hark! What is this I see,
Another square root of a three
As quietly co-waltzing by,
Together now we multiply
To form a number we prefer,
Rejoicing as an integer
We break free from our mortal bonds
With the wave of magic wands
Our square root signs become unglued
Your love for me has been renewed.
I’m sure that I will always be
A lonely number like root three
The three is all that’s good and right,
Why must my three keep out of sight
Beneath the vicious square root sign,
I wish instead I were a nine
For nine could thwart this evil trick,
with just some quick arithmetic
I know I’ll never see the sun,
as 1.7321
Such is my reality,
a sad irrationality
When hark! What is this I see,
Another square root of a three
As quietly co-waltzing by,
Together now we multiply
To form a number we prefer,
Rejoicing as an integer
We break free from our mortal bonds
With the wave of magic wands
Our square root signs become unglued
Your love for me has been renewed.
Tuesday, May 20, 2008
Food
I have such an appetite today,
I don't know if that's healthy or not.
All I could think about was bread and veggies.
If not pasta or fish.
I'm probably just hungry.
Didn't have dinner yesterday or brunch this morning, fail.
Tsk, I did end up getting bread, I'm content.
I don't know if that's healthy or not.
All I could think about was bread and veggies.
If not pasta or fish.
I'm probably just hungry.
Didn't have dinner yesterday or brunch this morning, fail.
Tsk, I did end up getting bread, I'm content.
Monday, May 19, 2008
Optimism/Pessimism
I can't choose between either end, so I'm sticking with being realistic, hopefully. I just want her to be okay. The last thing I want to hear is coming home and finding out that something's wrong. Right now being angry at someone you love is not going to help with anything, especially in this situation. A lot of fingers could be pointed at for the cause, but that should be dealt with after everything is stable. I'm not asking for everyone to put aside their differences and forget about the past because I can't even do that, not with this much going on, but at least keep peace when she needs it most. I just need to talk to whoever is taking care of her because I'm not satisfied with trying to figure out what the whole story really is.
Please let her be okay, I love her too much to let something worse happen to her.
Please let her be okay, I love her too much to let something worse happen to her.
Saturday, May 17, 2008
P.S. I Love You
http://thecia.com.au/reviews/p/images/p-s-i-love-you-poster-0.jpg
I don't think I've cried that much (considering how I don't usually cry that often anyway) watching a movie and I started to when it was just first starting out! The scene where Hilary Swank's character started to break down just had me down to tears with Lewis holding me while I was sniffling into a tissue. Rather tragic, but hilarious scene of us watching the movie though.
As cute as the movie was, it was really sad to me at the same time. I don't know what I would do if someone I loved that much suddenly had to go the way Gerard Butler's character did. I love the concept of receiving mail like that though, very intimate. I think this would fall into one of my list of semi-favorite movies (3.75/5 stars).
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
And Jasmine was right, if you meet one person from Lorien, you'd end up seeing a number of other Lorien people, too. I saw Brennon earlier yesterday, Sam from far away, Jasmine, Sarah, and Nadav. We need a Loreunion soon! I miss my old hallmates. Lewis and I had lunch with Jasmine and Sarah B at Pho Factory. The place wasn't too bad. We chilled at Barnes & Nobles for a bit and then headed back to our apartments while Jasmine went to class. This is when Lewis and I started to watch "P.S. I Love You". We went to Albertsons later that night, got some groceries (and ice cream!). The corn we had was really good, let's get more :). I was going to bake some tasty bread today, but I never did, too lazy.
Anti-Negativity
The more I hear about issues outside of the U.S., the more I don't understand why there isn't a movement of some sort to change things or interference of other countries to settle conflicts. I sound rather naive to make such a statement because I know I'll be responded with, "People don't really give a crap unless it affects them".
Is it national pride? Are things really out of hands to the point where political leaders have to look the other way to confirm their denial and continue with their reckless decisions? It affects more than the targeted enemy you want to capture or conquer, think about your country's people, their citizens, their families. It's just sad to see documented footage of a country falling apart due to violence. I'm not just talking about our country, but places like Uganda with children from ages 8-14 are abducted from their homes to become soldiers, or the 50-70,000 Russian neo-Nazi skinheads attacking immigrants. It's not new news because it's old, yet it still continues on.
I think this post is more of a reflection of how much I've grown since I've gotten to college. Yeah, I know, sappy. My classes this quarter especially has made me a lot more aware of how much younger community back then has done so much to change things. Not just the younger community, but everyone altogether. This kind of goes back to my post about ethnic studies, how the 3rd World movement magnetized a huge amount of participation to fight for a cause. I wasn't even born back in the '60s/'70s and it was exhilarating to watch so many people on the streets, marching, yelling, singing for a cause that meant the world to them. Why can't we make that big of an impact on history again?
My Sociology, Asian American Studies, and now my Linguistics class has in a sense woken me up. The rich history of anti-war and racial movements really fascinates me, all those documentaries we've watched in class and the material we've read about how strongly a belief can influence thousands of people. It makes me feel ashamed for the present time. We're stuck in a reality where we tend to take things for granted and assume that it doesn't need to change for the better because it's "okay" right now. I just question the validity of international allies and how corrupted our world really is. You would think that one nation's misery would be a model of what other countries should avoid and help to prevent. It just makes me mad that there are so many people out there that are worse off than our country and there isn't enough aid to help those out of their hardships. I feel kind of bitter and am harboring a semi-Yuri Kochiyama spirit about change, 'cept I don't think I can ever be a radical like her.
Again, this post, like my ethnic studies post, is probably incoherent.
Is it national pride? Are things really out of hands to the point where political leaders have to look the other way to confirm their denial and continue with their reckless decisions? It affects more than the targeted enemy you want to capture or conquer, think about your country's people, their citizens, their families. It's just sad to see documented footage of a country falling apart due to violence. I'm not just talking about our country, but places like Uganda with children from ages 8-14 are abducted from their homes to become soldiers, or the 50-70,000 Russian neo-Nazi skinheads attacking immigrants. It's not new news because it's old, yet it still continues on.
I think this post is more of a reflection of how much I've grown since I've gotten to college. Yeah, I know, sappy. My classes this quarter especially has made me a lot more aware of how much younger community back then has done so much to change things. Not just the younger community, but everyone altogether. This kind of goes back to my post about ethnic studies, how the 3rd World movement magnetized a huge amount of participation to fight for a cause. I wasn't even born back in the '60s/'70s and it was exhilarating to watch so many people on the streets, marching, yelling, singing for a cause that meant the world to them. Why can't we make that big of an impact on history again?
My Sociology, Asian American Studies, and now my Linguistics class has in a sense woken me up. The rich history of anti-war and racial movements really fascinates me, all those documentaries we've watched in class and the material we've read about how strongly a belief can influence thousands of people. It makes me feel ashamed for the present time. We're stuck in a reality where we tend to take things for granted and assume that it doesn't need to change for the better because it's "okay" right now. I just question the validity of international allies and how corrupted our world really is. You would think that one nation's misery would be a model of what other countries should avoid and help to prevent. It just makes me mad that there are so many people out there that are worse off than our country and there isn't enough aid to help those out of their hardships. I feel kind of bitter and am harboring a semi-Yuri Kochiyama spirit about change, 'cept I don't think I can ever be a radical like her.
Again, this post, like my ethnic studies post, is probably incoherent.
Sunday, May 11, 2008
Voicemail
"Hey Anne, it's Lewis. So I'm at Albertsons right now and I saw that they had chocolate dipped strawberries so I thought of you. If you were here, I'd totally get them for you, but since you're not suck it up, fool!"
That totally made my day, my boyfriend is hi-lari-ous.
That totally made my day, my boyfriend is hi-lari-ous.
"Olivia"
Lewis is right, I am definitely in my odd mind to be naming "inanimate objects". Plants do not move (as fast), but they are still living. I named a new plant that I gave my mother for Mother's Day. My mom absolutely loves orchids so I thought another addition to her collection at home wouldn't be so bad.
Meet Olivia :).
Meet Olivia :).
Friday, May 9, 2008
It's Good To Be Home
So my Dad and I planned a surprise visit for me to come home the weekend of Mother's Day for my Mom. Considering how I've missed out on the important holidays (birthdays, New Year's, etc.), I figured this was the best way to show her how much she meant to me. We're so glad she loved the idea of having me home, too :P.
Monday, May 5, 2008
Another Day At Work
I've been trying to go barefoot at the office today. That's pretty odd, but you can't blame me. These flats are killing me. So today I've actually had some projects to do: dissertations (yay for ProQuest!), some filing (boo), photocopying (long), and paging (meh), all of which I finished in 3 hours. Now I must study.
Saturday, May 3, 2008
New Plant
No I'm not replacing my orchids, I just bought it a new friend. Meet Emil/Stanley/Arnold/Fu Man Chu/Manchu/Eugene. Yeah, Lewis and I can't think of a proper name yet, but this plant is cool! I got it at the bazaar on Ring Road. I thought it was an aloe plant, but apparently it's not.
If anyone knows what plant this is, please let me know.
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